Moments of Haven Part 68
Warm-Up

"Hey, Heero."

"Aa?"

The laptop sat on the low coffee table while he sat and stretched his hamstrings on the carpet in front of it. While he was there, he took the opportunity to brush his fingers along the surface of the plush rug. He was really fond of that rug. It was all nice and cushy, and the color and pattern of the thing seemed like a warm glowy promise of what their living room would finally look like when they were done fussing over the details. "You ever read your junk mail?"

"Of course not." Unless he was wading through the pornographic material sent to the dummy accounts he maintained for work-related purposes. But Heero wouldn't call that 'reading his junk mail'. He put his right foot down and lifted his left behind him, feeling a pleasant pull in his quads. "I hope you haven't either."

"Of course not. But, like, the subject lines."

"I skim those on occasion. Making sure the filters are working properly. Why?"

Duo sat up straight and pulled his arm across his chest. "We get some pretty wacky stuff being generated sometimes. But this one's rather straightforward, and I gotta ask, why would anyone want a glass dildo?"

His balance wavered, and he put his foot back on solid ground. "...I beg your pardon?"

A snicker was stifled. "You do know what a dildo is, right?"

"...Of course," he answered after a pause. Just why did he know, anyway?

"Of course." That was no fun, but Duo supposed the guy knew all sorts of things he would never have expected, like things about circumcision and horseback riding. This little fact, he didn't want to question. "Never seen one of those e-mails? Right here, see?" He flopped his hand in the direction of his laptop's display, though Heero was likely too far away to read it. "Seriously. Why would someone want a glass dildo?"

Heero bent over to touch his toes, using the motion to mask the twitch that flittered across his face. "Why are you asking me?"

"Hm. Good point." Mostly because he just happened to be there, really. That was typically why Heero became the victim of Duo's verbal musings. "Well, I'm sure it'd be sturdy and everything, if you know what I mean. 'Cuz otherwise, wow, talk about a safety hazard. But that aside, I wonder what the benefits of it being made of glass are."

He planted his hands on the floor to steady himself before pushing back into a standing position. "Don't you dare click on it and find out."

Duo rolled his eyes and worked on stretching out his other arm muscles. "Hey, I'm not that stupid. A guy can wonder, right? It'd be pretty cold, wouldn't you think? Unless," he paused to snort with wicked amusement, "you wanted to embed some lights in it or something so it flashed different colors. Which would be novel, but still, I'm not seeing the benefits. It'd probably be heavy, too, which I guess for what it is, isn't bad, but, like, I could see it being hard to maneuver. And it'd probably be more difficult to embed any electronics or mechanics in it, combined with it being heavier, not to mention rigid--" He snickered again. "Okay, so maybe 'rigid' isn't inherently bad, either, but what I'm getting at is, I don't see how it could be equipped to vibrate or anything very well."

Heero bent down into a runner's pose, turning his face towards their blissfully placid flooring. "...I admit to not having given the matter any thought before."

"I guess it could be textured somehow. Glass isn't that hard to texture. But you could do that with any other material, too."

Alright, enough was enough. "The subject line is intended merely to attract your attention, Duo, and obviously it's done its job well. It might not have anything to do with the content of the e-mail, so perhaps there are no glass dildos."

"Nah, when they have those misleading subject lines, it's something like, 'you've just won one million dollars!' Or, 'hey, remember me?'" He tilted his head carefully from side to side while scrolling down through the contents of his inbox. "Geez, no way am I opening an e-mail from a guy named Cummings. Ooh, I like this one: 'subjective review of the hurricane reports manipulation congress march petulance entomology'. Don't look at me like that," he said immediately after, not even turning. "I didn't make that up."

Being familiar with the way junk mails tried to cheat their way past filters, Heero was inclined to believe him. That didn't mean that the subject line made any more sense, though. "I think a person would be far less likely to decide to open an e-mail with that sort of subject line."

"I admit, though, it does kind of make me curious what they're advertising. Glass dildos? Pyramid schemes? Discount breast enhancement drugs? You know what I haven't seen, lately? Any porn advertisements. No one's been advertising good ol' fashion porn sites of young girls banging any animals lately. Maybe they finally got shut down. Or maybe they just know I don't need any porn anymore now that I got the real thing right here at home." Now he turned, and his cheerfully wagging eyebrows were an unnecessary embellishment on the innuendo.

They would be a good deal better than porn, Heero thought. And there would be absolutely no animals involved. Or young girls, for that matter. "You do, however, require a breast enhancement?"

"Well, they're right, in a sense. My breasts are non-existent."

And they should really stay that way. Things were going quite swimmingly, just the way they were. "You really don't need any glass sex toys."

"Jealous?"

Heero sighed and gave up, sitting down near Duo and beginning a butterfly stretch while he was there. "...Are you doing this on purpose, Duo?"

"Well, no, I wasn't," Duo responded slowly. Wow. And he wondered where Heero got it, sometimes. A grin spread over his face. "But now that you mention it, I completely am. And you didn't answer my question."

Heero thumped his forehead against his feet several times before answering. "I have nothing to be jealous about."

"Aw, you think I'm that unattractive, then?"

He just snorted and shook his head.

"You think I couldn't net myself anyone other than you? You think you own me, now? You think--"

"I think," Heero cut in forcefully, putting his face right in front of Duo's and commanding his full attention. "That you're not the kind of person to give his heart so lightly."

The appropriate response to that would have been something questioning whether he had then given his heart to Heero, but that was sacred ground, not to be tread upon. Duo retreated gracefully with a slight nod. "Well... I suppose those glass dildos don't got anything on you. ...Though you didn't light up, last time I checked. Do you?"

Heero reached his index finger into the narrow space between their foreheads and gave Duo a push. "I don't think you'll have the chance to find out."

Duo affected a shocked and offended expression, though it was not without its underlying chuckle. "Oh, is that how it's going to be? You're going to be one of those kinds, are you? Sex isn't a currency, yanno. You can't just cut me off and think you'll get your way."

"That is to say, if ever there were a time for it to light up, you wouldn't be in a position to see it."

"Yeah, that's-- Oh." He smirked. "Ever? Never ever? I don't think so, buddy. I see how you are, now. You are definitely not getting your way whenever you feel like it, now."

"I hope our ways end up coinciding, then, otherwise things are going to get a little rough."

"I can do rough," Duo purred, but the kiss that followed wasn't. No, it was hot, and it was thorough, but it wasn't quite rough. Duo pulled away with a gasp, his eyes wide. "Did you hear that?"

Though his body wasn't completely on task yet, still dealing with the results of seconds recently past, Heero's mind changed tracks and he shot wary glances towards all corners of the room, and in particular towards the large living room window. It was shuttered, but it was still there. "What?"

One corner of his mouth lifted from the breathless way that single syllable had been spoken. Then the rest of his mouth joined the upward trend when he recalled the rest of his point. "I made... I've been making suggestive remarks!"

Oh, he had done a lot more than merely 'suggest', which was why Heero blinked at him, slowly processing that there was no threat present.

He bounced in glee. "And I didn't blush like a friggin' virgin once! Not once! I'm free! Free at last!"

Heero waited patiently for that to compute. "...Free?"

Duo pointed a quivering finger at him. "I'm free from you." He poked Heero's chest for good measure. "You don't have any power over me any more! Aha! Take that! And that! Maxwell is back in the house!" He was in a tremendously good mood, and it was only fair to share such positive vibes, right? He dragged Heero forth for another kiss. Mmm, that was good. He helped himself to another. And another. And then he murmured, right there against Heero's lips. "We shouldn't let all that stretching go to waste."

Heero laughed, one of those quiet laughs that stayed mostly in his chest, except for where it floated across a minimal distance to penetrate Duo's senses as well. "My thoughts exactly." He wrapped an arm firmly around Duo's waist and hauled them to their feet. "We were going to the gym."

"I am so going to kick your ass tonight."

"I don't think that was supposed to be the point of this exercise."

"Aw, don't worry. Whatever I hurt on you, I'll kiss it and make it better." He let Heero have a sample of such a treatment.

Heero restrained himself from unproductive comment and attempted to stay on track. "Training exercise, Duo."

"I know. Training. 'Cuz really, you're going to kick so much ass during your class, I need to kick your ass now. Lord knows I can't do it in front of the class, but someone's gotta keep your head level, and I guess it's gonna be me."

"All things considered, Duo, you're very bad at keeping my head level."

"Well, that's what training is for, yeah?" He pushed Heero away lightly. "What are you waiting for? Let's head out already. Unless you're stalling. Chickening out?"

Heero let his response be non-verbal, picking up their backpack and moving toward the door. Duo was on his game, tonight. Trying to fight back on his turf was a losing cause. Heero needed to hang back and re-draft his strategies, given this new development.

Behind him, Duo sighed. "This cold weather's kinda sucky."

He paused, turning slightly. That seemed somewhat random. "Is something wrong?"

"Yeah." Duo walked solemnly to his side. "Cold weather means you're wearing these sweatpants, and not any cute little gym shorts." He gave Heero's butt a good slap before sailing on by. "Well, come along. Let's get this started, man."

Duo was at the front door before Heero stirred and jogged to follow. Hopefully, once Duo got over the novelty of his 'freedom', things would settle down a bit. But tonight... tonight was going to be an interesting night.

OWARI

 

To The Next Chapter

To The Previous Chapter

Back to Jei's Fanfictions Page

Back to Guests Fanfictions Page

Back to Main Page